Decision Making in Children
When a child decides, he is exercising his freedom. But also, in addition to his character and determination, he is letting his parents see behind him, opening his arms so that he can fly.
The decision-making process is elementary in everyday life. Every person has to make decisions all the time, such as what to eat? left or right? do I like or dislike? what to do now and then? among thousands of other questions that arise so instantaneously that almost no we realize that we do them.
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Bit by little, during childhood, decisions start to form. For this reason, it is very important that we know how to guide our children, since in this way, we will achieve that the decision-making process becomes a valuable tool in their lives, and not a reason for overwhelming.
What is decision making?
Decision making is the process by which we select the best option within the available set, to solve a particular situation.
In this way, the decision-making process can be present in any sphere: social, family, work, etc. Then the selected option will be considered as the most:
• beneficial.
• Viable.
• Correct.
• adequate.
In other words, in the decision-making process, the existing data is analyzed and based on the different alternatives offered by the situation, one is chosen to obtain the greatest benefit.
During childhood, children are helped to choose many things, from clothing to food, in such a way that they are allowed to visualize what options they have and why some are better than others.
If we go with them to a candy store, even though we take into account what catches their attention, we help them decide on the best option.
Some recommendations for decision-making in children
Deciding is an act of will. It takes courage, confidence, discernment and judgment. When children decide and do so firmly, they are demonstrating their freedom. Here are some recommendations for parents, who have the difficult task of teaching their children to fly.
Avoid overprotection
It is very difficult for parents to avoid feeling overprotective. This is because they know the difficulties that reality offers and they want to avoid pain for their children. But the errors are the ones that educate; to make mistakes and to amend, tempers the spirit.
Parents have made it so and they cannot deprive their children of that experience. In any case, they will not be able to prevent it from happening to them at some point, when they are not there to avoid it. The best then, and most recommendable, is that both parents and children face the adventure of trial and error.
Value effort and learning from mistakes
As a consequence of the above, it would not make sense to open the doors for them to experiment if we later negatively evaluate the error. It is not only to see the positive side, but to recognize the problem in all its dimension; because that is precisely what allows the error.
The error helps to see the complete reality, from the difficulty and the effort; allows you to see what the blinding brilliance of triumph does not allow you to see.
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Accomplish chores at home
Children at home must have obligations, tasks according to their age, commitments that need to comply with fixed delivery times. The notions of social time support their actions and prepare them to take on tasks and fulfill them.
weighing and choosing is thinking
There is a curious relationship between the word regret and think. Thinking comes from the Latin 'pensāre', which means to weigh or calculate. So that between the two we can locate a bridge, the word weigh, which is just what we do when choosing.
So, let our children weigh, that is, reason and think; have options and ultimately choose. These simple actions are very complex, and respond as we see to the highest functions of thought.
• Inputs from the decision-making process
• Decisions allow children to develop:
• The ability to discern.
• critical ability.
• Responsibility (and in the long run, ethics).
• Empathy, or the ability to put yourself in another's place,
• Problem and/or conflict management.
• emotional influence
According to psychologist René Diekstra, life skills are acquired abilities in the social, emotional, and ethical domains that support and enhance cognitive and intellectual abilities.
Reason and emotion cannot be separated. Therefore, learning to manage emotions is key to teaching your children to make more assertive decisions. It must be borne in mind that emotions have a decisive influence on decision-making.
You can learn to educate your emotions and thus easily find a balance. As Diekstra proposes, in an interview with Elsa Punset, in order for our children to learn both to manage emotions and to make decisions, they can be included in activities that teach them to practice self-control.
Activities to manage emotions
The activities that best help the child learn to identify and manage emotions are the following:
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